22 July 2011

Please, sedate me

I used to pride myself on how healthy I was. Really, I just don't get sick often and can pass through entire cold/flu seasons with barely a sniffle. And then I started to get older.

You know about my fibroids right? I mentioned them before, I have four of them which I think are large and need to be removed. I saw the gynecologist and she basically said that she would need to be convinced that surgery is the best option. So far my life is just inconvenienced by them and that, apparently, is ok. She sent me away with another requisition for another ultrasound and an appointment for October. She'll compare the size of the fibroids from May to October and see if they are growing, if they are then surgery moves up on the options list. Until then I just get to deal with feeling pregnant. Yes, pregnant. I asked the doctor if that's normal because my clothes don't fit and my belly is getting larger but I'm not gaining any weight. She said my uterus is about the size of a 3 month pregnancy so of course my body is shaping like there's a baby in there.

So now I get to deal with very heavy periods (I lift heavy stuff at work, can you imagine the discomfort?), thick waist, heavy pelvis, cramping pelvic floor muscles and increasingly less room for my bladder to expand like it used to. None of this makes me a happy camper.

Meanwhile, my face has broken out in a nice new crop of acne. I've always had pimples on my face but only one or two at a time since puberty. Over the last couple of years they've gone away leaving me with clear skin for the first time in my life. Then I noticed my forehead was starting to look like a mountain range. No redness, just bumps galore. And then my chin erupted into a small burst of pimples.

These pimples aren't like the normal kind. Normal ones develop a white head, get popped and go away. These develop a white head, get popped, and take up residence on my chin, happily creating a neighbor pimple. They also burn and itch. I thought it was herpes, which I do have on my face and almost never have an outbreak. But those tingle more than burn or itch and do eventually go away. Then I thought it was excema so I bought some cream and watched as the pimples got worse. About this time I remembered having a similar rash beside my nose twenty years ago. It was initially treated with hydrocortisone cream which made it worse and expanded to my whole face. I saw a different doctor and he said it was bacterial and gave me antibiotics. They worked. Rash of burning, itching pimples gone. Until now.

Armed with that information I went to the Medicenter for antibiotics. The doctor prescribed some oral ones and cream. It almost, just about worked. As soon as I finished the prescription the pimples came back, with some newbies. I went back to the Medicenter for something different. This time I was given a two month supply of something different - Minocycline and a cream. It's almost, just about working but it's only been a week. Then I broke out in hives.

Ok, not hives right away. Last night I went to pick up J and his girlfriend and my scalp itched something fierce. As I was raking my fingernails through my hair while trying to drive I was praying it wasn't lice infesting my head. When the itch moved from my head to my chest I stopped considering lice. I scratched my chest, shoulders, back, feet, ankles, legs and hands raw in addition to my scalp. This kept me up for hours when I should have been sleeping peacefully. At about midnight I finally got out of bed and found a phone number for a 24 hr pharmacy to ask if I can take Benedryl with the Minocycline. He said yes and also said the itch wasn't caused by the antibiotic. Whatever. I took Benedryl and slept. Probably scratched in my sleep wherever I could.

When I got up to have a shower my skin was raw. I looked and saw huge raised red patches that itched and burned at the same time. Clothing hurt. Sweating at work from lifting hurt. Trying not to cry and scratch was extremely difficult.

After work I went to the pharmacy where I filled the prescription to ask if this itching/hives thing was an allergic reaction to the Minocycline but the pharmacist said no. If I was allergic the itch would have happened after the second dose, not the fourteenth dose. He said I probably ate something I am allergic to. But I stayed away from shellfish, I thought, and then remembered the hot peppers.

I never really enjoyed hot peppers. Found them too hot and burny. Maybe twice a year or less often I would eat the banana pepper that accompanies my Quizno's sub, or have hot pepper rings put on the veggie sub from Subway. But for some reason I was craving them mightily. I went out and bought pickled hot pepper rings and pickled banana peppers. I made a salad with them (with lettuce, green & red peppers, cucumber and black pepper) which I had for dinner, then lunch the next day. Then after my lunch of Fire Salad I put the hot pepper rings on a chicken sandwich for supper. The next day I had Fire Salad again for dinner. Then the itch began. I think the hotness is trying to escape my body via my bloodstream. Do you have any idea how difficult it is to not scratch even when you know it will burn?

So at work today I had the Bad Poops from the antibiotics for my acne-riddled face, a bladder that needed emptying about every 45 minutes because my uterus is swollen, constant heavy flow from the arrival of Mother Nature and the desperate need to crawl out of or unzip my skin to escape the itch.

I wanna be sedated.

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